Troll was Awesomely Bad

    You know how some movies are so bad their good, well the classic campy horror movie Troll definitely falls into that category.  Everything about this movie screams classic.  It featured Sonny Bono as swinging bachelor who gets attacked by a troll and pretty much blows up.  It also featured a young Julia Louis-Dreyfus.  The family in the movie has the last name Potter and the father and son are both named Harry.  That's right their both named Harry Potter.  Granted this movie came out in 1986 a full eleven years before the first Harry Potter book came out.  The film has horrible cheesy special effects, even for the '80s.  It has stars Phil Fonacaro, who you might recognize as the little person whose been in everything.  Just one look at his imdb page and you see what I mean, he played an ewok in Return of the Jedi, he was in an episode of Star Trek: Next Gen, he was in Willow, he played a carnie in the horribly campy '80s horror flick Ghoulies II, Roland in Sabrina The Teenage Witch, and an elf in The Polar Express.  Apparently he was also in some movie called Evil Bong, that sounds like it just might be so bad I'd need to see it. 
    For some reason this movie had a sequel and Troll 2 was even more awesomely bad than this one.  There has been a documentary made about Troll 2 entitled Best Worst Movie.  I think that says it all.
    According to the internets, Troll is planning a remake of the movie now.  Any remake of it won't have of the redeeming qualities and it'll be just bad. 

Movie Review:Visioneers was a Strange Dark Comedy

Visioneers is a very strange dark comedy.  It starred Zach Galifianakis as Washington Winsterhammerman a level 3 employee at the Jeffers Corporation.  George has an average life.  He is miserable.  He is in an unhappy marriage.  Add to that people start exploding due to unhappiness.  George starts having recurring dreams in which he is George Washington and becomes worried when a doctor tells him that is a symptom of impending explosion.  As the epidemic worsens and his dreams don't stop, George starts rethinking the life he has been living.  I have been a huge fan of Galifianakis's work for years and I heard of this movie two years ago when he talked about it online.  The film was very interesting.  For a dark comedy it wasn't very funny.  It's interesting to watch this after seeing Galifianakis in The Hangover because the two characters he plays are so different.  The film was very well made, but I it was nearly as enjoyable as I hoped.  I posted the trailer for the film below.

City Island was a great indie film that should have gotten more exposure

City Island was a very entertaining film with a great cast. Great performance by Andy Garcia.  This is probably my favorite of his films.  His character loved his amll community but it seems wants to secretly want to break free from it.  He works as a prison guard but wanted to try to be an actor and has secretly been taking an acting class.  Alan Arkin had an interesting role as Garcia's acting coach.  Alan Arkin played more of a realistic acting coach than you usually see in TV and films.  Usually acting coaches and acting classes are portrayed with ridiculous over acting.  Ezra Miller is once again great. Everything I see with Miller in it he plays pretty much the same character, but he does it so well. I liked how his character was really into fat chicks but the girl he likes thinks he's some ass-whole who makes fat jokes. You really don't see many teen characters who are really into fat chicks, especially when it is done in a since way. Julianna Margulies was good, but I've definitely seen her do better a better performance.  Her accent seemed forced at times.  Emily Mortimer really reminded me of Emily Watson.  I liked The big climax and it was very rewarding and very funny. This was a very well written film that should have gotten more exposure.  I don't think I even heard of this film until it was released on DVD.  The DVD cover is what initially struck me.

You'll notice I know have switched the font of my blog posts from Comic Sans to Tahoma.  Everyone always shits on Comic Sans and I like other fonts so I finally gave in and charged the font.

Jared Leto was creepy good as Mark David Chapman in Chapter 27

Chapter 27 is about Mark David Chapman and what he did in the last three days before he shot John Lennon 4 times in December 1980. Jared Leto was great and almost unrecognizable putting on so much weight to play Mark David Chapman. He looks eerily like Chapman in the film. The movie had it's flaws but it was still fairly good. I liked the idea of Chapman telling his story from the mental institution. I liked all the references to the Catcher in the Rye. I bet in those final three days before Chapman shot Lennon he really did make similar references to the book as he walked around Manhattan. I liked how the film was named Chapter 27 as if it was a continuation of Catcher in the Rye, which has 26 chapters. Lindsay Lohan was surprising ok, not great but OK. That's probably only because she didn't play a big character in the film, if she did she probably would have brutally killed the film.  It was really weird that the guy who portrayed Lennon was named Mark Lindsay Chapman.  I was disappointed with the ending though. He shots Lennon and then it ends. Right after the real Mark David Chapman shot Lennon he sat down on the sidewalk and started reading the Catcher in the Rye again. I wish the film would have continued just a little longer to show what Chapman did after he shot Lennon.  The scenes with the coffee shop guy were funny.

Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant try their hand at a more serious film with Cemetery Junction

I only rented Cemetery Junction because it said written and directed by Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant. Though I didn't enjoy it anywhere near as much of other work of theirs I've seen. They made names for themselves as brilliant comedy writer/actors but with this film they have successfully proved they can write a more serious film. I wasn't sure if I liked the film until the end when it finally came together.  Some of the deleted scenes were very funny.  I'm guessing they took them out to maintain the more serious tone most of the film had.  The scenes with the coffee shop guy were funny.  I give it 3 out of 5 stars, speaking of which I want to think of some new thing instead of stars to rate movies with, any suggestions?

The Chumscrubber tried to be a good indie film but fucked it up

The Chumscrubber was a lighter kind of Donnie Darko film. Some of the acting wasn't the greatest and some of the casting could have been better. Kind like a sick twist on Desperate Housewives. Where the film fails is in how it tries to mix Donnie Darko with Desperate Housewives. It tried to hard maintain both elements and ending failing at both. It is kind of like two films stuck together. If it was a film about the adults in town and how fucked up they are and how they don't really care about the kids it probably would have been good. If it was a film about the kidnapping plot and how fucked up the kids are it may have been a good film. However when they mixed them together they kind of half-assed it and it failed. The strange animation segments were just dump and really took away from the film as well. However at times I did enjoy it so I give it 2.5

Hot Tub Time Machine Was actually really funny

I just watched Hot Tub Time Machine and have decided to start posting film reviews again.  When I first heard of the film I really wanted to hate it. But I got to say it was really funny. The concept is utterly ridiculous but it's still really funny. Craig Robinson and Rob Corddry usually play supporting characters in their films and it's nice to see them playing leads. Clark Duke was funny, he usually is. In the end of the film all the guys had better lives because of what they changed in the past. But wouldn't there also be bad, possibly horrific, changes too when they returned to present?  

I just felt like ranting a little....

This started out as a Facebook status message I was typing but appearing status messages can't be more than 420 characters now, (when did they make that rule) so now I'm putting it here and expanding it some:

     I had a discussion with my grandmother yesterday about the proposed mosque to be built near ground zero (I read somewhere that the proposed spot where they want to built the mosque is actually a few blocks away from Ground Zero and not as close as the Teabaggers make it sound).  My grandmother said she agrees which the people protesting it. She said a mosque shouldn't be built near grand zero because the terrorists were Muslims. To which I replied, "Yes the terrorists were Muslim, however we can't then say all Muslims are bad. There have been many many Christians who killed people and did horrible things. Does that mean we shouldn't built any Christian churches anywhere near where a Christian did something horrible?" She said, "But this is different" and then changed the subject. But is it really different? I am not trying to attack Christians, I am just trying to make a point.  Thousands of murders were/are Christian but Americans never have said all Christians must be evil and bad.  No because Christians doesn't think they should all be blamed for what some Christians have done, then why should we blame all Muslims for what a few of them did.  Again I am not trying to attack Christians (or any religion) just making a point.  

What Jesus Really Looked Like

       This is actually kind of interesting.  According to some researchers the image on the left is what Jesus probably actually looked like and not the image on the left which is how most in vision him looking.  Jesus would probably look Middle Easterners, because he was Born IN THE MIDDLE EAST.  Show this to the all the Christians who go around hating Middle Easterners, their precious savior looked just like one.  You can read about the image research here: Which image looks more like Jesus?.
      On a similar note me and one of my friends from college were once discussing what would happen if the story of the birth of Jesus happened in modern times. As in if a women named Mary got pregnant but she and her boyfriend/husband, Joseph, had never had sex and then she tried to tell him it was a virgin birth and God had but the baby in her stomach. Joseph would never buy that story in this day and age. He would call here a cheating whore and never talk to her again. Or something like that.

PLEASE GO VOTE FOR ME FOR MTV'S NEW TJ

Go to http://tj.mtv.com/open-nomination/ and vote for me (ribzy12) because the winner gets a job at MTV to be their new TJ (Twitter Jokey) and the job pays $100k a year and I could REALLY use the money. I know MTV is lame now and a TJ probably sounds stupid, but please just go vote for me.  It only takes a second go to the site, click launch and in the nominate box type ribzy12.  Just please do it.  It only takes a second.

If you have a choice between watching the "film" The House Bunny or watching paint dry, you're better off watching the paint dry

     It was on one of the movie channels of TV and I figured, "It probably at least a little funny." Wow was I wrong. The whole time I was watching it I kept saying, "Well it cold have potential, it might get better". Then about 2/3 of the way through I just said, "This is it isn't it, there is no way this movie is going anywhere." The story was ridiculous and extremely predicable. It was just a sexed-up and crappy version of many similar movies about misfits in college. The cast was really off, although Anna Faris was perfectly cast. I hated Kat Dennings character, I actually like here but she was so wrong for that character. And was here a lesbian or not? It seemed like she was but after her makeover she kind of turned straight, which is a great message for kids isn't it? Then there was Emma Stone, I think this is the first movie of hers I've seen that I didn't like. She just seemed like she was over acting the whole time. And I was sad that Colin Hanks was in this, he actually could be a very good and much more respected actor if he didn't do such shitty movies. And Katharine McPhee should quit her day job because she isn't the greatest actress. Although maybe she should quit here day job because at the very end of the film she sung a song while the other girls danced around her and she sounded horrible. And what was with the giant manly farm girl? That character was just useless and really really stupid.

Youth in Revolt wasn't bad film

    I just finished watching the film Youth in Revolt.  It wasn't necessarily what I expected, but it a was a very good film. I like this new breed of teen film. The movie had the perfect cast. Michael Cera was perfect for the role. His awkward persona can't go on forever though, there are only so many films he can play such similar characters.